Valentine's Day

* I did not write this, but I find it heartfelt and true. I think this is something we should all reflect on, single, or not. Anyway, I just plain and simple liked this column, although I do not know the author. It did get a little messed up when I copied and pasted it, so too bad.*

In three days, our relationships will begin to feel like chocolate-coated prisons, and our souls will be crushed under the weight of clichés. Guys who are waiting until after Valentine's Day to break up with their girlfriends will be giving stale chocolate candies and flowers taken from graves, and those who are trying toprove their love for that special girl will be giving yellow-gold andsalt-grain sized diamonds from K-Mart.

My most memorable Valentine's Day was when I got a snow-globe-style necklace and box of candy in the fourth grade from my dad. My second most memorable was when my (now-ex) boyfriend showed up at my house and handed me a piece of paper. I turned it over in my hands, anxious to see if it was a gift certificate for a manicure, a ticket to a concert, or... a flier for a discounted car wash. "This was on your front porch," he said.

The rest of my Valentine's Days have been spent either flipping through the STD section of my health book and silently wishing all the lovey couples I saw a "Happy VD!" or hanging out with single friends, eating ice cream and watching non-romantic comedies.

So what is Valentine's Day? I'm not entirely sure, but I do know three things it is not.

1. Valentine's Day is not a day to prove your love.

It's no secret that this day has been exploited by greeting card companies, florists, and that Harry Richie guy to make up for the lack of sales between Christmas and Easter. They preach that Valentine's Day is a day to prove your love, and if you really care about someone you'll get them a card designed by a middle-aged woman that is an accurate expression of your innermost feelings. And you'll spend a ridiculous amount of money on a dozen red roses that will wither and fade, as love tends to do. And then there is the jewelry. I heard a radio ad today that urged men to buy her this special limited-edition 3 diamond ring, where each stone stood for something about the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard, unless it stands for"Now I'm Broke."

2. Valentine's Day is not about opportunity.

I always find it fantastically annoying when a girl tells me she's been dropping hints since Christmas and knows for sure she's getting aTiffany's tag bracelet or Dooney & Bourke charm bag. First of all,when did February 14th turn into a day of opportunity and second, if you are going to treat it as such, why ask for a crappy status symbol? But it isn't just the girls. A lot of guys approach Valentine's Day in the same manner they did prom night. And so they give the girl a $10 limit at Dennys, tell her she looks nice, mumble something about love if they have to, and hope to get some.

3. Valentine's Day is not a test.

We all know that Valentine's Day triggers the crazy, especially in the girls who use what they get on this day to gauge what their significant other thinks about them. Flowers and chocolate? He's into you. Flowers, no chocolate? He thinks you're fat. Rose petals, Barry Manilow and a stuffed dog that barks out compliments when you squeeze his paw? Oh my gosh! You'll be engaged by spring!

So if Valentine's Day isn't about proving your love, testing your love, or getting something for yourself, then what is it about? Let'stake a brief look at the history of the holiday. In 270 A.D., the emperor or Rome felt that married men were more emotionally attached to their families, and thus, would not make good soldiers. So he banned marriage. St. Valentine, a bishop, saw the heartache this caused young lovers, and so he met them in secret places and married them. And then they killed him. But the point is, St. Valentine worked to keep young lovers together. And so maybe that's all Valentine's Day ought to be about: "being together."

February 14th is a day set aside to appreciate the person you take for granted the other 364 days of the year and to show them that appreciation. You don't have to spend a lot of money; you don't even have to spend any. Pick crummy field flowers. Bake a heart-shaped pizza. Go out to dinner and happily complain to one another about how horrible it is that Valentine's Day has become so commercialized. Do whatever. Just enjoy being together.

For those who are single, there is often a love/hate relationship with Valentine's Day. On the one hand, it is the one day of the year when everyone at the bars is single… but, then again, it's also the one day of the year you wish you weren't there, rolling your eyes and complaining about being single. But, hey, there are always plenty of fabulous single people with whom you can celebrate your mutual un-tied-down status.

If you have a relationship this Valentine's Day, forget the drama and trying to figure out what he's trying to tell you with a mixed bouquet of yellow-and-red roses or what she really meant when she said,"Pizza? Awesome." And just enjoy being together.